Monthly Archives: April 2008

Fidelity in a Poly M/s Family

Fidelity can mean different things depending upon the situation. In this instance I am referring both to fidelity in the old fashioned amorous sense, as well as fidelity to the event which brought the situation into being. Being-faithful involves more than old fashioned sexual mores. It involves a truthfulness to the event that precipitates how one counts-as-one the multiplicitous situation one is already a part of .

In our case that situation comes from two definitive events – the getting-together of the four of us as a quad family, and the collaring of the two girls to me.

Fidelity then for us is fidelity to both of these events. This doesn’t mean some kind of occasion marked by an anniversary, and it doesn’t include acceptance into a convenient social fiction such as marriage. Fidelity to an event means to develop the situation initiated by these events as fully as possible while remaining faithful to their original meaning. Turning things around, this type of fidelity is the true fidelity of anyone in a faithful marriage. Developing the responsibility of building a family around four adults, in a situation of absolute enslavement, with the community of people we have chosen constitutes the specific situation these events engendered.

As I have said, this responsibility, on my part, is unlimited within the M/s dynamic. As the girls’ Master I have the responsibility for everything that they do within the situation of absolute enslavement to which they submitted and entered into. They in turn have the responsibility of developing their obedience faithfully and aligning their wills with mine. Within the quad we have to a greater or lesser degree taken on all the responsibilities of being a family to the individuals within the group, such that I now find myself with certain responsibilities towards emmie’s kids, for instance, but it is not as totalizing as the responsibility to emmie or to mitda. Fidelity to the quad means faithfulness to that as my first and most important family, the family whose life I am part of every day and whose blood now runs through my veins and the veins of everyone in the quad.