E., emmie’s husband, has found a new interest in mastery over the last little while. He had been making tentative steps towards it for some time now, first recognizing a dominant nature in himself, but wanting to express it by being a “service dom”, then moving closer to actually dominating by assisting in mitda’s punishments.
Dominating in a TPE sense is very different than the dominating done in a scene or at a play party. While I don’t hold, as the originator of the term TPE did, that people involved at a play party or in a time restricted scene are not really dominating or submitting but just playing at it, there is a wide variance between dominating someone in that situation and becoming someone’s Master 24/7/365, with all the responsibilities that go with it. Derrida has said that “responsibility is excessive or it is not a responsibility. A limited, measured, calculable, rationally distributed responsibility is already the becoming right of morality.” I once made the mistake of trying to take a day off, and as E. himself put it, the results were “clinically interesting” and “personally terrifying”.
So despite earlier misgivings about his desire to shoulder the responsibility, E. has decided that he would like to master a slave of his own. Of course this changes the dynamics of our little M/s family just by being a stated desire. Not that I’m against the dynamics changing, we are here to help each other grow in whatever ways we happen to grow, and I’m looking forward to seeing E. develop his mastery. But if / when he discovers the girl he wishes to enslave to himself things will become very interesting indeed.
Changing things has already had its effects felt in such an intimate and complex relationship as we have. E. has altered his relationship dynamic with emmie and they will be working out how the marriage is to progress on a slightly less egalitarian set of terms. And this will not be necessarily a simple or easy change for either of them, with 7 years of marriage behind them. mitda went through a sudden panic of feeling “unnecessary” and had to be metaphorically dragged back into the fold. Of course she is necessary. And she is as involved in these changes as fundamentally as any of us, if not as immediately as emmie and E.
So altogether an interesting and challenging set of developments., I am looking forward, in a sense, to being able to mentor E. with the little I know of mastery. And of course it is a push to me to learn more, so as to be able to share more. Not that I wasn’t pushed to learn more already. It will be a push as well, I think, to emmie’s submission, and while mitda already behaved towards E. in a submissive manner I expect that to increase and deepen. Of course the girls are still enslaved to me, they pledged their being to mine and I would not trade either of them for the world. If and when E. does find his own girl she will be his and his alone, I am a happy, satisfied, and occasionally overworked Master to mine.