Dominants get a lot of flack. We’re accused of being “spousal abusers with an excuse”, or “sadists with a philosophy”. The thing is, anger is a huge part of abuse, and lack of control the other major factor. Sadists get off on pain, domination is a tool. Dominants get off on control and domination, bondage, discipline and sado-masochism are tools of that control. Submissives or slaves want, crave, need that control, discipline and domination from their Masters.
Not that this post will convince anyone who doesn’t know and understand someone involved in internal enslavement or total domination.
Even in the best BDSM relationships, dominants with the best slaves, submissives happy and adoring of their masters, sometimes things don’t go right …
Today we played and it didn’t go right. Maybe mitda wasn’t in the right frame of mind, after all she had her day put out of rhythm by emmie and I being home. She’ll get used to emmie being home but the Master being home on a work day always upsets things. Anyway we played and neither of us could get properly prepped or into it. And it didn’t work. She got nowhere near subspace and I got nowhere near domspace. Yes there is such a thing.
I’m still learning, and so are mitda and emmie. Perhaps I should have used my hands instead of toys, to gauge her response. But shoulds aren’t the answer. We all have to continue to learn our places and each other.
Last week, after many years of avoiding psychiatry, emelina was diagnosed with a number of complaints (no, sexual deviancy wasn’t among them). Aside from the shock of actually dealing with a diagnosis, she has been dealing with the side effects of the medication she was put on and hasn’t managed a day of work since, although she has tried going into work twice now.
Family income isn’t really a big issue at the moment. We can survive off my income and E’s income quite nicely. It would be great if emelina can get disability but nobody’s really getting their hopes up on that, we know too much about the SSA and their methods of avoiding awarding disability, especially to psych. patients.
So not the fun type of day we had on Sunday, although we started off the morning with some good group morning sex. I decided to work from home after realizing I needed to learn some things about my current project code base and didn’t want to do that learning in front of my colleagues.
mitda and emelina should be back shortly from the misadventure at work. I suppose we’ll discuss what can be done to either help her get back to functioning or deal with her being at home with mitda.
Last week, after many years of avoiding psychiatry, emelina was diagnosed with a number of complaints (no, sexual deviancy wasn’t among them). Aside from the shock of actually dealing with a diagnosis, she has been dealing with the side effects of the medication she was put on and hasn’t managed a day of work since, although she has tried going into work twice now.
Family income isn’t really a big issue at the moment. We can survive off my income and E’s income quite nicely. It would be great if emelina can get disability but nobody’s really getting their hopes up on that, we know too much about the SSA and their methods of avoiding awarding disability, especially to psych. patients.
So not the fun type of day we had on Sunday, although we started off the morning with some good group morning sex. I decided to work from home after realizing I needed to learn some things about my current project code base and didn’t want to do that learning in front of my colleagues.
mitda and emelina should be back shortly from the misadventure at work. I suppose we’ll discuss what can be done to either help her get back to functioning or deal with her being at home with mitda.
